No matter the number of years you have spent in your courtship/relationship, the fact remains you are not married. Courtship is always a period to put your partner understudy before you finally agree to make it legal.
However, bear it in mind that the period of courtship is the foundation of where the marriage will be built and renovated continually. Just like the buildings can never stand for ages without a solid foundation. Have you ever come across mighty towers on the street and do you for once wonder what it would have cost to erect such gigantic structures. Same way I want you to view the marriage you want to build for yourself.
Things you accept or reject are the materials for erecting your home. As time goes by, the marriage gets stronger and better. Everyone must pass through this stage in life if you think of getting married.
I will show you with brief explanation what you should never take during your courtship/relationship; if your partner
i. Physically Assaults: I see some guys get angry and battered the face of their partner just because they had misunderstanding. If you are in these shoes, please pack out. No reasonable person should beat his/her partner irrespective of the anger/annoyance. Remember you are not married. If physical assault is prohibited in marriage, how much more courtship.
ii. Cheats: Do not always assume your partner will change when you get married. If he/she is not matured enough to stick to a person, marriage will never stop him/her from cheating likewise. Marriage is forever and the fact that he/she still cheats shows he/she is still evaluating who to stay with. Do not keep saying he/she loves you and still cheats on you. Loving someone does not stop cheating; it simply shows such person is indecisive.
iii. Compares You With The Parent/Ex: This is so crazy. If your partner always compare you with the parents or ex whenever you have misunderstanding, is better you evaluate the relationship again. The parent could still be bearable but as for the Ex; HELL NO! Never take such comparison. It is malady.
iv. Still Has Cordial Friendship With The Ex: This is very simple, quit. Your Ex is never your friend. Parting ways revealed things did not work for them as they thought. They should give way finally and let new relationship spring up. Never accept that from your partner.
v. Must Seek Your Attention: If your relationship is the type you must always seek for attention or beg for your partner’s presence; my dear quit. Both parties must understand that they need to make out time for each other no matter the tight schedule. Begging for attention when you are still in courtship is totally wrong. Never accept it.
vi. Placing Friends Above You: I have read some stories in the past about relationship. Partners placing their friends above their relationship. Ask yourself this question, who are you getting married to? Yes, they have been there before you met but once you are in courtship; your friends must try to step back a bit and let you build your relationship.
vii. Disrespecting Your Siblings/Family: On no condition must your partner always talk about your family without respect even if they offend him/her. If your partner disrespects your family, he/she can never respect you. What goes around comes around.
viii. Uses Any Abusive Word without Control: This shows such person is not matured yet. Your partner must never use abusive words like F**k off, b***h, ass h*le; etc. Irritating words should never be accepted in courtship. Using such words out of annoyance is never an excuse. If you are married, it could definitely leads to physical assault. Words of your mouth must be glorifying and not demoralizing.
I will stop here and continue some other time. I want you to digest the content and reflect back into your own relationship. A change is needed now before you finally say I do.
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